My Favorite Four Plus One!

My heart belongs to these beautiful people~

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Memories from the previous post subject!

John and I have lots of memories from this time in our life 10 years ago. I thought I'd share a few and my last post from today was getting too long so I had to create a new one.

1. The doctor he saw at Moffit's name was Dr. Albert Einstein...who wouldn't trust this guy?

2. We were all in college and broke as could be of course, eating ramen noodles to survive...John was trying to work full-time and go to school full-time and times were hard. Our friend Rebecca one night at a Bible Study gave John $100 as a gift. This was a lot for a college student and all she had saved for the month or so for herself. She just did it out of love and care for John and obedience to God.

3. We remember the night at Bible study at the Steigners house where he told our closest friends. They all sat around him and put their hands on him and prayed for him.

4. Dave Bearden and Chris Basham went with him to Shands in Gainesville to Bank Sperm (just a long for the ride of course :) What are friends for.

5. His best friends to this day sometimes call him "Uniball".

6. Every friend that John has ever had since this time has called him with some kind of self diagnosed groin or testicular pain that they think is cancer. They all want to talk to John for him to tell them what to do. It is actually comical at this point.

7. John's mom had a cancer policy on the family (who knew it would be her son that it would get used for) and when all was over and she got the payout it equalled I believe over $10,000 in which she gave to us when we were getting married. We used this to put a down payment on our first house and buy appliances.

8. The kids call Daddy's illness "the cancer germ".

9. When John was in the middle of his radiation, we went to Destin to visit Dave and Debi Bearden for the weekend...He was so sick and didn't have much of an appetite. We went to this restaurant called Goatfeathers which was a fancy seafood restaurant. John and I were going to split a meal b/c of his nausea but they wanted to charge us something like $7 to split a meal. David almost walked out...how ridiculous!

10. When John woke up from surgery he was so pumped up on pain pills and anesthesia. Dave Bearden and I went back to talk to him and see how he was doing and he was talking so out of his head and saying some of the funniest things. He had us crying we were laughing so hard! He also puked on me in the car on the way home :(

11. Apparently, Chris Basham went with John to pick up my ring after it had been sized for the big night and was the first to try my ring on :)

12. John knew of a girl named Harriet Brown that had started going to our church that also worked in the ultrasound department at TMH. He used to see her at work when he worked in the ER. He was praying as he went for his ultrasound of his "male parts" that it would not be Harriet that did the scan and it was NOT to his relief! She ended up marrying his friend Jeff later that year just before John and I got married :)

Cancer FREE

I have been waiting and waiting to post for this day...so excited that today we get to celebrate the 10th anniversary of John being cancer FREE! We are so blessed to be able to celebrate this wonderful anniversary! John recently visited his surgeon and urologist and was given a great bill of health and all tests were normal. Since I've never written down the story of his cancer journey, I thought I would today since now I have a blog.

John and I were both full-time students..both 21 at the time and had been dating about 4 years. I was in nursing school and John was in paramedic school. I remember him telling me he was having some pain in his groin. He saw his primary doctor and was treated with an antibiotic. The pain got better for awhile but came back about three months later and now John felt a lump in his testicle. He went back to his primary doctor who sent him directly to a urologist. After being seen by a urologist, the doctor sent him for an ultrasound that same day. John was called the next day and asked if he had parents in town, when he said yes, the nurse said we need to make an appt with you and you should bring your parents. Can't be good news with that kind of intro! So him and his parents went back to the doctor and John was told he had testicular cancer (seminoma). He was told that if it had not spread, he may just only need surgery, but it could entail some radiation. He was told that it was very curable and most of the time it did not reoccur. The doctor immediately scheduled a CT scan to check out the rest of his body, surgery was scheduled to take the one testicle and John was told he should immediately go and bank sperm.

I remember him telling me very vividly. We were going over to a friend's house that night. He picked me up at the house where I was living with 5 other girls and in the car on the way to the friend's house, he told me he had cancer. I cried and cried. We still visited our friends but while I was there I called my mom and cried on the phone to her. That night when he was dropping me off, one of my roommates and her boyfriend were at the door. Her boyfriend had just asked her to marry him. It was hard news for me, because I wanted to marry John and now we were about to embark on this journey. I remember lying on my floor that night in my little bedroom crying out to God to not let this man that I want to marry and spend the rest of my life with die. Of course it is very hard to be in nursing school when you find out something like this b/c your mind starts thinking everything negative.

So all the doctor's appts started. John banked sperm twice. The doctor explained that men that have testicular cancer are usually prone to being sterile. He made him go through some sperm analysis tests which showed he was not sterile but had a very low sperm count (about half of most men) and slow motility. This was before he even lost one testicle so the doctor wanted him to bank some sperm for the future since his sperm count could diminish even more after surgery and radiation. He was told it would most likely be very difficult for him to conceive naturally. He had surgery to remove one testicle in October of 1998 and went to see a specialist at Moffit Cancer Center. When they did the CT scan of John's abdomen, they found one maybe two lymph nodes that were cancerous. This caused concern due to his young age. He was referred to a radiation oncologist who would most likely to radiation to his abdomen. Dr. Scidmore was his name and what a great doctor he was. He loved John and took such good care of him. He wanted him to get the very best treatment and wanted him to see a specialist at Moffit to make sure radiation was the best choice for such a young guy. CHP didn't cover this but somehow (we are not sure to this day) Dr. Scidmore sent him there. John also never had to pay anything out of pocket to see Dr. Scidmore. I truly think Dr. Scidmore was picking up the bill. The question about radiation was that sometimes radiation can actually cause a secondary cancer later on down the road (20-30 years) and with John being so young this could pose a problem. If he didn't do radiation, then he'd do chemo which has many more side effects and problems in the present. We saw a doctor at Moffit that said the chance of a secondary cancer are low and the effects of the chemo are great for the small amount of cancer that they needed to eradicate so he said he'd go with the radiation (even if it was his own son).

So radiation was started in November. If I remember right, he went three days a week for three months. He had CT scans every month. Those were rough b/c of having to drink all that contrast. The radiation was uncomfortable. They do everything they can to protect the male parts and then radiate the hell out of the abdomen. He has permanent tattoos in place to this day which they used as markings as to where to radiate. The side effects in men are worse for radiation to the abdomen. He was nauseated all the time, vomited on and off and had a lot of cramping. He lived on phenergan which made him very cranky!!!! He had no appetite. Thanksgiving and Christmas were bummers that year because he couldn't eat. BUT John went to school full-time and worked full-time through this all! On January 29th 1999, John received his last radiation treatment and was given a clean bill of health. This was a very big day for us!

Little did I know John had very BIG plans for this day! He also on the same day had taken his paramedic state boards and passed them! He wanted to go out for dinner somewhere fancy. I was hesitant and actually tried to stall him. I thought he had had too big of a day but my roommate was in on it and insisted that I do what he wanted b/c it was his big day. She even took me to the mall to pick out a "little black dress" from Ann Taylor to wear. We went to dinner and to my surprise he drove me to Melhana Plantation in Thomasville to eat dinner. We took a horse and carriage ride. Then he acted as if he was calling his Grandmother who lives in Thomasville to see if we could come by. I thought it was awfully late to be stopping by his grandparent's house. Instead he drove to the center of town, main street, where they have this beautiful old water fountain in front of the courthouse under the huge oak trees. We sat there and talked and he gave me a penny and said to make a wish and throw it in. I did and as I threw the penny in....I looked down in the water and there was this huge beautiful diamond sparkling in the water. He reached down to get it after he knew I saw it and got down on his knee and asked me to marry him and said some really sweet stuff that I don't remember! Good thing my roommate convinced me to go that night!!!

I couldn't believe that he put my ring in the fountain where it could have been lost or sucked up or something. It was gorgeous and the setting was one that I had seen like six months earlier at a jewelry showing in the mall. He told me at the time it was way too expensive! He bought the setting I guess and then picked out a diamond to go in it and created a marvelous ring just for me! Little did I know he had help with the ring hiding and it really had not been in the fountain for very long....David and Debi Bearden were hiding in the bushes across the street and had hidden it for him and made sure no one came along and took it. That was that call to his "grandmother" he had made. He had already asked my Dad's permission that day and everything. What a big day this was...John was a busy boy on January 29th!

So we have lots to celebrate on this day..it is almost better than any other anniversary day b/c it signifies so much for us. Now him and his doctor/surgeon have jokes about the whole fertility matter (hence us being on number three kid without any medical intervention). Blessings are apparent all around. I love you John! Happy Cancer Free anniversary...I'm making a special dinner tonight just for you!

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Love languages

Lately, John and I and some of our friends have been talking about love languages. There is a book that many people know about...The Five Love Languages. I have to admit I have never read it cover to cover but I think the whole principle of the book is very interesting and lately have seen how the way you give and receive love is very important. The love languages are: Physical touch, Quality time, Gifts, Words of affirmation, and Acts of Service. If you figure out what makes you tick, what makes you feel good, loved, and affirmed then this is mostly likely your love language. From what I understand this is the way we want to receive love and most of the time it is easy for us to give love in this way as well. Many couples I am sure never figure this out. Lately John and I have had friends that have "figured" this out and have taken time to explore their love languages and so John and I started talking a lot about it. For instance in our marriage, I love to hear (with words of affirmation) that John loves me, appreciates me, wants to be around me, etc. This creates a problem sometimes when he doesn't speak those words to me (John is not a talker). I feel like he doesn't care...but when I say this to him he says are you kidding, you know I care because of the things I do for you....hence his love language coming out....acts of service. He is the most amazing husband in his acts. He helps around the house, takes care of us, does Daddy Duty better than any man I know, etc. You should have seen the way he took care of us when I was sick during my first trimester. John is a doer, this is how he shows love....and needs to receive it! This causes problems in that I am NOT a doer! If you want to show John love then make him breakfast in the morning, pack his lunch, keep the house presentable, and have his laundry washed! I am not the best at any of these acts although I tell him everyday he is loved, what a wonderful person/husband he is, how amazing he is etc.(does he even hear this?)....so how do two people that have different love languages come together...well I guess differences attract and that is what makes marriage fun and hard..We have to really work at showing love to the other person. It helps when you actually figure things like this out. We laugh about it a lot! He knows now why I constantly ask for his approval with dinner and being a mother etc. It is actually kind of funny when you know this about yourself b/c you can laugh at yourself. When I got off of work the other day, I was in the best mood...WHY? Because three different people had told me how cute I looked that day pregnant...how vain is that!

It is also interesting to figure out what your children's love languages are. We know that Emily's has to be physical touch. She loves to hug, kiss, touch, and cuddle. If you turn her down b/c you just feel plain "hung on" then she is extremely dissappointed and feels rejected.

We think (even though you are not suppose to "assign" a love language to your children until age 5) that J.D.'s is words of affirmation. He does extremely well with praise and likes to know he has done a good job.

Kind of a fun thing to explore!

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Decisions

Don't you just love it when you are going along minding your own business and then a really big decision is put in your path and you really have no idea what to do. This happen to us this week. As in a earlier post last month, John was interviewing for a promotion....he did not get it at the time which was o.k. with us. He received great comments after his interview and was told that it was a very hard decision. So this week, he found out that the person that was offered the promotion declined it and now they were offering John the position. This took us way by surprise and at first we were both really excited. To make a long story short, John would be a captain, go to night shift, and be on salary now instead of being paid by the hour. This all sounds pretty good except for the night shift part but then we found out that he would be taking a pay cut for a little while due to not being able to make overtime as usual. Salary position jobs cannot make overtime and really I did not realize that his overtime made us that much money but it does! This promotion though is a HUGE leap in his career and has great potential for pay raises and benefits etc.

At first my initial reaction was to freak and go on and on about why he should say no and why it is so unfair...but something or someone I should say told me to stop and take it easy and keep my mouth shut. I have been really praying and trying over the course of several years now to be more of the kind of wife that I know God wants me to be...supportive, obedient, quiet in spirit, and more of a listener. This is very hard for me. I decided to pray for John and I prayed that God would give him guidance and a peace about whatever decision he made. I also prayed for our finances. I realized that fear and doubt are huge barriers in my faith and that everything I almost freaked out about had to do with fear and doubt. So it was such a relief when I handed all this over to God and I have to say in the three days it took John to think about it, pray about it, seek guidance from two friends about it, and talk to the EMS administration about it....I really was not concerned. I had this peace that if John and I were both seeking to do the right thing and making our decision based on biblical principles..then God was going to bless it. After mulling it over for three days, John made the decision to take the position and now is Captain John Gay. He will no longer be on the regular ambulances. He will be on the Supervisor's Truck overseeing the crew for his shift. There are only six Captains in the whole service and this is a very big opportunity for him to advance his career. It means a lot to him that his superiors would have this confidence in him and I am very proud!

John said to me that it meant a lot to him that I didn't freak and starting squawking about my thoughts and worries. I think it helped him make the right decision for me to be quiet and just pray for him....as well as bless our marriage. Thank goodness for the times when I am actually still enough to hear God's Holy Spirit talking to me...wish I listened more often!

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Review of Today

So how did I do.....today was much better...setting your attitude is a great idea, I just know that it is difficult to do that everyday!

So I opened the Bible fairly early today (at about 9:00) and enjoyed studying a little about Samuel and how God used him even as a child. I did have some prayer time even if it was in the shower!

I have spoken more kindly to my children and have not been such a nag...did give out spankings to the little one but that wasn't my fault!

I went to Home Depot for John, got more green paint, and painted around all the trim in the big kid's room. Hopefully this was a big help to him.

I have tackled the laundry, although not caught up. Still a work in progress!

Monday, January 19, 2009

Failure to Favorable

Well today was a rough day...I end the day feeling much like a failure in that I have had a bad attitude all day long, yelled at my kids, been bossy and well pretty much ***chy all day long! I know I could blame it on hormones but I really honestly think it was me being selfish and not having much patience and well not asking God for these things. So a friend of mine and me today were talking about this over our Bible Study today...I was feeling guilty and asking for prayer and all and she reminded me that our former pastor used to say something along the lines of setting your attitude in the right direction makes all the difference. (this was not the exact words but something like it). So for tommorrow I want to feel less like a failure and be more favorable in my children's eyes, my husband's eyes, and more importantly God's eyes.

Tommorrow my goal is:

To open the Bible First thing in the morning and ask God for help just for this day!

To speak more kindly to my children

To get the laundry caught up (for anyone that knows me, this is certainly a hard thing for me)

To serve my husband by doing at least ONE thing that would make his day easier

My goal is to set my sights on a better attitude and a better day tommorrow!

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Remodeling and Rearranging

John has six days off and the baby girl will be here is 9 weeks so we decided that it might be time to prepare a place for her and at the same time try to fix up the house a little. Bad thing about being on a budget is that we don't have enough money all at once to do everything we want to do in the right order....it causes some confusion and disarray to say the least. But on the upside...who really cares. It is not like we have company over all the time and not like we are the type of people who have to have it all done at once and done perfectly. So here are the projects that need to be done.....we just aren't sure which order so it is a little chaotic right now in the house.

Really the whole house on the inside needs painting...but before baby comes we would like to at least get kids bedrooms painted. New carpet and flooring. We want carpet in only the bedrooms and laminate wood in the rest of the house. We have bunk beds to get and put together. Both older kids need new dressers. Bought a new stove yesterday !!! Baby furniture has to come out of attic. If we do all the floors in the house the old tile and carpet have to come up....

So as of today...John has pulled carpet out of both kid rooms, I'm going to pick out carpet for those rooms, we will probably have it put in right away (not the rest of the house) so that we can paint and get the bunk beds and rest of the furniture set up. Then maybe we can work on the rest of the house.

It is a little mind boggling to me, especially since mess and chaos make me itch a little (Revell family traits coming out in me) but I love the way John works and makes it all happen and eventually it will all get done...God teaches us patience through it all and it makes for less stress if we just go with the flow!

All we really HAVE TO HAVE when baby comes is somewhere for her to sleep and a bed to change a diaper on...right!!!!????

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

CCS

So now we are back in the swing of things, school, work, and all Christmas and New Years stuff is behind us. I have had two days now since the kids have been back at school that I have been by myself. Time to get ready for the baby, time to catch up on those everlasting chores, and some time that John and I have had to be by ourselves. Emily started back to school last week and she was so excited. She missed her teacher and was looking forward to seeing her friends again. School choice is something John and I have spent many hours praying and talking about. I went to private school growing up and John went to Public school. We know A LOT of families that home school. Emily started Preschool one day a week when she was almost three years old. Mostly because it sounded so nice to have one morning a week to myself and plus I was pregnant and trying to get ready for J.D. to be born. These were selfish reasons. She loved going to school and was at a wonderful Church Preschool. I feel like I know the teachers and administration there so well now and John Daniel loves it as well. When it was time for us to decide on first grade for Emily, I bugged and bugged John about checking out Community Christian School. He flat out told me no, that we could not afford it. Orientation and visitation came and went last January and registration passed. I had come to the conclusion that Emily would attend the public school down the street from our house, which is actually a very good school. One of the reasons we moved to the neighborhood was for the schools. One day out of the blue in May John said I think we need to check into CCS. I was like what, all the deadlines have passed etc. But he pushed me and I did. We went for an interview with the principal and tour of the school. She took us to the chapel where the first grade was having their chapel time. The first graders were reciting by memory a very long piece of scripture and doing sign language. I was so overwhelmed that I started crying and could not control my emotions. There is something about hearing the words of God spoken by young ones that makes me so happy. I of course was sold after that and I didn't even need to know about the curriculum. CCS is different than many other Christian schools in that they are not necessarily a evangelical Christian school, they believe their purpose is to partner with Christian parents to raise their children in seeing the world through Christ's eyes so that then the children can grow and have a strong foundation to go in the world and make good decisions and share the gospel.

At first we were a little skeptical about sending her to a school where everyone is for the most part "just like her" or least they supposedly come from a Christian home but then I thought, what is wrong with wanting to protect my children, give them a strong foundation, loving environment...there is sure enough time in this world to make them understand that not everyone believes what we do and makes the same decisions as we do.

After our interview with the principal we were told that there was not a spot for Emily and that she would be put on a waiting list. From that time on, I didn't worry about it and never signed her up at public school. We just waited. John said he would pray every time that he passed the school sign (which is multiple times in the day seeing as thought we have to pass the school to get out of our neighborhood) that God would provide a spot for her or that he would show us the best place for Emily. We got a call in July that there was a spot that opened up. We were elated. We had a second interview with the principal where we got to talk about Emily, her learning style, her personality etc.

We have been so blessed to have her there. She loves Mrs. Dolly, the children, and the activities and subjects and yes she can already recite 4 long passages of scripture with words and signs and I cry to the point of shaking every time I hear her. The teachers are all Christians, they love her, they care about her well being and her spiritual growth. The school is small and she feels confident in being there. This was especially important during the first three months when I was unable to be an involved parent b/c of my pregnancy. I really have felt secure that I knew even though I was sick and couldn't be so watchful that she was being taken care of there. Now, of course, I never want to send my children anywhere else, but as John says, we will take it month by month and year by year. God is good!

Thursday, January 8, 2009

swimming in January!

Yes, swimming in January....I am sitting in Ft. Lauderdale Fl as I write this on the back porch of a very "South Florida" type home watching my children swim in the swimming pool. The pool water is 82 degrees and the kids are loving it. The weather here is beautiful...no mosquitos, no heat, just nice 76 degree weather. I think the pool weather is a little cool but the kids sure won't admit it and they are having a ball with their cousins. We are here in Ft. Lauderdale for John's Sister's graduation. Eve is graduating from Ultrasound school after three years at ATI College of health in Miami. We do happen to be here at the same exact time as the national championship game which is a little crazy but it has not been that bad. Lots of gator fans everywhere...makes John ill! Having a great time relaxing in beautiful weather. We've been upset that December and January in Tallahassee has felt more like October but at times like this it is very nice!

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Rascal

John and I are anxiously awaiting the arrival of #3. It has been 4 years now since doing the baby thing so we are a little nervous. Just today watching my 4 and 6 year old play on the playground...I was thinking about how easy they are. Me sitting on a bench while they played by themselves for hours. Emily is a very precautious girl, fearful at times to some extent. She is shy and timid and sensative. She is very obedient and it does not take much discipline to make her understand who is boss. She is actually a lot like me when I was a little girl (at least how I view myself). She cares about others feelings, wants to do the right thing, and does not break rules. John and I joke about how she keeps us on track...once in the mall when J.D. was still in a stroller, John was going to do like most dads do and try the escalator with the stroller. She saw the sign that said NO Strollers. Well she would not go with us down the escalator for fear that we would get in trouble. Another similar story....her two best friends have a trampoline and she was over playing. The trampoline sign on the outside said no more than two people on at once. Her friends' father is a deputy. I told her that it was o.k. to go on, just be careful....she asked is Mr. Paul going to be mad if we are all three on the trampoline. She actually wanted to wait until he got home to ask his permission.

Now J.D. is a little different. He is quiet and very obedient but has a stubborn streak. He is a little more daring than Emily and likes to try new things. He can and will push me especially but he does well with words of affirmation and seeks to please so he can receive praise. He also right now wants to do and be everything like Emily so he follows her direction for the most part. He is so sweet and lovable and has been a fairly easy toddler. He loves just spending "Boy" time with John so as long as he is hanging out with Daddy he is happy.

They both were pretty good sleepers and nursed well. I guess after the kind of pregnancies I have, the baby stage seems easy. I just feel so much better when that baby is out of me! They for the most part potty trained easily, slept in their own beds, and have not been wild children. Now I know I forget some of the bad as most parents do.

John said the other day, wouldn't it be fun if the third one is kind of a RASCAL...you know a different personality than the other two, maybe a little daring, or spunky...."What? Do you know what you are asking for?", I replied. I have this vision of a crazy little red headed wild girl running around...! Genetics and personalities are so interesting to me. I wonder a lot and have talked to friends about what makes our children the way they are. John's Grandfather's wife said to us recently that calm parents make for calm children. John and I have been called relaxed or calm by several, even our pediatrician who asked if we had older children at one of Emily's first baby appts with him. When we said no, he said we were unusually mellow for first time parents. I always thought it was our medical background. My mom sometimes tells us we are too calm...I like to think it is our way of discipline, team work, and scheduling that makes life go a little easier. Now some days I feel like I could pull my hair out but most days are pretty smooth....so we will see how it is after our little "rascal" is born......oh my what has he asked for!!!!

Friday, January 2, 2009

Friends

I have been aware again this Christmas and New Year's Season of how blessed I am to have the most wonderful friends in the entire world. (I would like to break for a moment and tell those reading that as I sit here and write this my wonderful children are cleaning my house...J.D. vacuuming and Emily mopping...crazy but wonderful.) So back to my friends. This season John and I have been very busy catching up with friends, doing fun things, and have literally received call after call about hanging out....tonight my two best friends are coming to my house. Rebecca has cooked lentil soup ....she says it is a sign of prosperity for the new year...John is a little concerned about it so he is also grilling sausage to go with. Amanda is bringing dessert and I am making the sides. I have known Amanda well as long as I can remember.....since the first grade. We have great memories and more than I could even write about. Amanda met Rebecca in the 10th grade at Leon High. I didn't go to the same high school but Amanda and I remained friends and then she introduced me to Rebecca. Rebecca and I hit it off the minute we met and we have been the best of friends since. The three of us did everything in high school together, went to Bible Study together although we all went to different churches, talked, hung out, dated friends, went to concerts...etc. We then all went to TCC and to FSU. I seemed to be the one that always knew what I wanted right off, I went to nursing school, dated my high school sweetheart all through college, married him after college, and was pregnant by our second year of marriage. Amanda and Rebecca are both married but have not started families yet. They are so wonderful to always include my kids. Rebecca has taught my children music. Amanda has babysat and cooks with them. My kids love both of them. They are the type of friends that I can go sometimes two weeks without talking to and then pick up right back where we left off.....They truly are what kept me (and John) out of trouble.

Over the years I have had more great friends. John and I were in the youth group at church and our youth pastor and his wife were some of our best friends and still are. They too kept us out of trouble and were wonderful mentors to us even though they weren't much older. David and Debi had us over for dinner ALL the time while John and I were in College. We were over at their house hanging out, eating or talking. We went on trips together and even visited them in Memphis on our honeymoon. David has been an excellent mentor for John and someone to look up to and trust. David dedicated both our children at church, they were in our wedding, and have been there for every major occasion. David even escorted John to shands during his cancer treatment. We have some really great memories with them...vacations and all. Now we have kids and today actually got together for our kids to play at the playground.

John and I have been blessed to have other friends that we have known since we were dating...that too kept us out of trouble. We all had the same values, went to church together, wanted to do the right thing....I truly believe that this is the reason I was able to walk through the college years and come out with very little regret. Brian, Amy, Daniel, Eric are just to name a few (all were in our wedding). John still goes on a "guys trip" with the guys every year which to me is the best medicine for a man. He gets to relax and regroup with guys that have known him for forever. Amy and some of the other girls I have talked about go on a girls trip and have the same kind of bonding. Jeff and Harriet and Kim and Rusty joined our little group and all of us have gone our different ways, different Churches, even different towns but love each other just the same......we have gone vacationing together, shared hurts together, had children at the same time, shared joys together, kept each other accountable and just had fun. I was so sad when Harriet and Jeff moved away b/c John and I had just moved into their neighborhood. Harriet and I would always babysit last minute for each other. But even though we don't see each other as much we have been able to keep in touch and talk and visit one another. Even went on an amazing ski trip with them last year. Her and Jeff are great couple friends in that we have a lot in common, struggles and all! I love having friends that I can say I have known for 15 years or more! John was recently updating his resume and the names he put on his reference list were names of people he had known for 15-20 years. These are men that he really knows, talks to, and hold him accountable!

More recently I met my friend Ann who I actually probably see the most out of all the above people. I was so glad to find a friend that had girls....all the rest of my friends had had boys and Emily was the only princess! Emily and Katie and Olivia hit it off immediately. Then I had John Daniel and she had Cooper. This is John Daniel's best friend. Now Ann has Elle and I am about to have a little girl. It all works out perfectly. Ann and I probably have the closest schedule to one another and our girls do ballet. Ann is different than my other friends in that we didn't grow up together...we met each other as women and moms but we have bonded and find it easy to talk to one another. We share the fact that our husbands both work shift work which is something most people can't comprehend. Ann is fun and spunky and a very real and honest person. Very good to talk to!

I wasn't going to get so personal in this post...thought I'd just talk about how blessed I am to have such good friends but I love sharing about my amazing friends. I have been called a "goodie two shoes" (even was awarded this award at my 8th grade band banquet) and have been asked how I kept out of trouble and stuck with the straight and narrow for the most part in high school and college....well other than my faith and my parents...this is it...FRIENDS! They kept me on track, prayed for me, held me accountable, attended Bible Study with me, were there when John and I were dating, and to this day ask me how I am doing and really mean it! Recently Ann and I in our Bible Study that we are doing together read in Psalms about encouraging your friends and this can mean doing it sternly...I am so thankful for my friends that have done this! When praying for my children this is probably, other than their salvation, what I pray for the most..their friendships. I know from experience it is such an important part of growing up and as I now am in my thirties...growing still!