I think one thing that parents wrestle with a lot is how to grow responsible children that will do things for themselves, help out with family chores, and do it with a good attitude! John and I have wrestled with this a lot over the years especially since Emily is at an age where she can really help out around here. We have done chore charts (only to last for one week or so), we have done stickers as rewards, we have made them do it just because, we have read scripture to show them why it is necessary. I think the thing that we struggle with is do you reward your children for doing things around the house or should things be done just b/c they are part of this family too! I know that I never got paid an allowance (at least I don't remember it) for doing my chores. John said he didn't either. John knew how to do his laundry in elementary school. I on the other hand learned in college :) but mom did make us do other things like clean the bathroom. So John and I have once again been thinking about it. We have one child (J.D.) that loves to work. He actually got a vacuum for Christmas and uses it most days. He loves to dust mop since we got our new floors, loves to help sort laundry, etc. Not sure if it is just b/c of his age but he always seems pretty helpful except where his room is concerned sometimes. Emily on the other hand is our princess and can be a bit lazy (like her mother I have to admit). She would rather dance, read, draw or talk! She is actually a very obedient child but you have to ask her to do everything....she will not normally offer to be of help except if something is new to her. John has struggled with the idea of asking them to do things that aren't neccesarily their responsibility like when the baby comes, watching her or helping with baby tasks (changing her etc)...he has said before that it isn't there job to take care of the baby, it is our baby but he also realizes that this is a family unit and there is a line and a balance.
John and I have been following Dave Ramsey's Money plan for awhile and really like his ideas. Another thing we want to teach the children is money management. We have read a little bit about this from Dave Ramsey. He does not believe in rewarding children for doing everyday chores but does believe that you can teach them really good money management skills in making them work on commission for things that they want. He suggest having them write a list of things they want (the list can change numerous times). He then suggest having a list of things (chores) that they can do when they want for the most part to earn money. I like this in that I cannot possibly make Emily do chores everyday b/c of school, homework, different activities etc. But on the weekend she could do several. He suggests assigning an amount of money to each task. Most in our house will be 50 cents. Then he suggests doing the envelope or jar system. Basically 10 percent to give, 10 percent to save and 10 percent to spend. This helps in counting money, teaching the child the importance of giving and saving and working for a living all at once. John is huge into you work hard for what you what. We have noticed that Emily has gotten a little bit into the "I wants" and the "please, please, please please, can I have this" which is probably our fault and we so want her to be appreciative for the things she has and the things people spend their hard earned dollar to buy her. One of the most important lessons my mother and father ever taught me was to say thank you no matter what, act excited and happy for whatever someone gives you, and always write a thank you note! I really do appreciate this lesson.
So we started our little commission system yesterday. We have a list of things that the kids must do just because they are "part of this family". This lists include things like putting their dirty clothes in the hamper, picking up trash on the floor or putting snack trash in the trash can, picking up dishes after they eat, putting their shoes in the garage, picking up wet towels and helping feed the dog. Most of these things are literally things that I think if I have to say one more time to do, I might go insane. These are those pet peeve kinds of tasks that I really do not think I should have to do. The kinds of things that make me yell :) This list is posted on their bathroom mirror so every night they can run through the list and it can help them remember the things that should be done. If I have to do these tasks then money gets taken away! The other is a list of chores that I normally do and don't mind doing but think they should be learning and would be a great help to me and daddy if they did. Putting folded laundry away is worth a dollar and it is worth every dollar to me for them to do it (this means mine and John's laundry too). Emptying the dishwasher is 50 cents. I like this b/c I can't sometimes wait for Emily to be around to empty the dishwasher but if it is something that needs to be done and she is available then great and she can earn some money. There is a list of 13 chores that they can make money for.
Now this is all well and good but does take some time and effort from mommy and daddy and that is where we have lacked in the past...and it has to keep Emily's attention so we are going to have to work really hard to make her see the that she is reaping reward for her labor. We will see how it goes.
Colossians 3:23 Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men.
Proverbs 14:23 In all labor there is profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty.
No comments:
Post a Comment